This Is It
by RRfan4life
Summary: The before and after of Ross and Rachel's groundbreaking first kiss. [oneshot, rating just to be super safe]


**Disclaimer:** The characters do not belong to me, sadly. They belong to Bright/Kauffman/Krane, as does the actual scene from the show included in my fic.

**A/N:** This is a stand-alone fic, my take on the missing scenes of TOW Ross Finds Out. Enjoy :-)

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Sighing sadly to herself, Rachel tied her apron around her waist behind the counter at Central Perk. Another day, another dollar. She took a quick look at all the customers waiting to be served, knowing beforehand how messed up their orders would probably get. She'd be the first to admit she wasn't the best waitress.

However, today, she had a feeling it'd be worse. It wasn't only because her head and temples were pounding from the last few yards of a hangover, although that certainly wasn't a positive contributer.

"God, could I have been any dumber last night . . .", she quietly questioned herself. "Closure, my ass."

"Miss? Have you gotten my decaf double latte yet?"

Geez, complaints already. "I'll have that for you in a minute, sir. Just waiting for the coffee machine to warm up."

Truthfully, she hadn't even known the guy ordered.

She handed the man his drink, then propped her head up on her hands as she leaned on the counter. This morning, surely, had to be one of the most embarrassing moments of her life. Had she really tackled Ross in an attempt to get the phone? Ugh. She rubbed her temples in slow circles, trying to regain her composure.

So he knew. It couldn't be the end of the world, right? Sure, he was with Julie. And they were getting their cat- the _stupid_ cat he'd share with _stupid_ Julie while she could do nothing but watch with _stupid _envy. How could he do this to her? She was Rachel Green- his high school fantasy, the woman he'd lusted after almost the entire year and a half since she moved to the city.

But there was one thing her mind wouldn't allow her to let go of- there was something in his eyes when he found out. A spark, smouldering beneath the usual chocolate exterior of his stare. He knew damn well that she wasn't over him- that much was obvious. And she couldn't help but feel convinced that he wasn't over her.

"Ma'am? Excuse me, miss? _Ma'am!_"

Rachel snapped back from her thoughts. "Yes, sir?"

The new customer launched into a tirade about ordering three times and having yet for her to even write it down. All she could do was apoligize over and over, and try to explain with as much sincerity as she could that her head was in another place.

It was gonna be a long day.

Not only did she end up getting that guy's order drastically wrong, but she misheard five people, forgot the orders of three, forgot two ordered at all, and wasn't even aware of four- all in the next two hours.

"Rachel, I'm getting a lot of complaints," said her boss, Gunther, carefully.

"Ah, Gunther, I'm sorry. Bad day."

He contorted his face into one of overdone sympathy. "I'm so sorry, Rachel. If you need a shoulder to cry on," he brushed off his shoulder to show her, "mine is available." With that, he disappeared in the back to wash the bathrooms.

Around five at night was when the coffee shop grew slow. Rachel made herself a coffee, and curled up in the big comfy arm chair next to the orange couch. Finally, a time to collect her thoughts.

"Rachel, I'm here!"

Or not. Phoebe loudly bustled into the coffee house, blonde hair flying and guitar case in hand.

"What?"

"I'm scheduled for today!" She took a look around the almost empty room. "Hm, tough crowd already."

And so the one opportunity Rachel thought she'd have to figure this all out crumbled into the horrible twang of Phoebe's made-up guitar chords and almost painful vocals.

"_Sometimes men like women, and sometimes men like men. And then there are bisexuals . . ._"

Rachel's hangover, at least, had melted away. Although this playing was certainly bringing back the head ache . . .

"Rach, sing along!", Phoebe exclaimed.

"Sorry, sweetie, I gotta get back to work," Rachel replied, seeing a few new customers litter into the shop.

Three hours to go. Yippee.

'Someone gimme a gun,' she thought bitterly to herself.

"_And that's how we get hamburgers!_"

Phoebe's set finished an hour later, much to the joy of all the customers of Central Perk.

"Thank you, everyone! And, in case you were wondering, I _do_ accept checks!"

Rachel chuckled at her friend, making it the first smile she'd cracked that day. Phoebe always seemed to have that effect on people- so childishly innocent and quirky. You couldn't help but grin at her.

"Great job, Phoebs."

"Thanks Rach! I've gotta go meet Monica for dinner now, but ..." She lowered her voice. "Your aura seemed a bit off the whole time, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Rachel lied. "Just tired, and I had a hangover."

"Hmm, well . . .okay," Phoebe replied, unconvinced. "Hang in there, sweetie."

Rachel watched as she left the coffee shop, waving after her. She took a look around at the customers, realizing how many had yet to be served. She was gonna be getting an earful tonight.

Finally, closing time. The morning had just begun to feel like a distant memory in Rachel's mind, an unfortunate occurence from far in the past. She almost forgot about it as she switched the sign on the door from "Welcome, we're open," to "Sorry, we're closed."

She wished her mind would close already.

She occupied the time before returning home by scrubbing the counter, cleaning up a cappuchino she'd spilled earlier. From behind her, she heard the door open.

"Sorry, we're clos-", she began, but stopped dead as she saw him. "Hi," she said softly.

Ross stared at her, his expression blank. "I didn't get a cat."

She wasn't sure how to respond to this. "Oh, that's, um . . .interesting."

His face changed as he became visably frustrated. "No, no it's not interesting. Ok? It's very, _very_ not interesting. In fact, it's actually a hundred percent, completely_ opposite_ of interesting."

She noticed the anger in his voice, and it stung. "Alright, I got it, Ross."

"You had NO right to tell me you _ever_ had feelings for me!"

Ouch. That one would leave a scar. She became filled with pain like an eye becomes filled with tears.

"_What?_", she asked, visably upset and her voice full of hurt.

"I was doing great with Julie before I found out about you!"

Now her anger was working up as well- how could he lay this entire burden on her?

"Hey, _I_ was fine before I found out about_ you_! You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie?"

"Then you should have said something before I met her!"

"I didn't_ know_ then!", she genuinly retorted. Somehow, he seemed to know she was right. "And how come you never said anything to me?"

"There was never a good time," he defended.

"Right, you only had a _year_, and we only hung out _every night_," she sarcastically shot back.

He wasn't gonna back down that easily. "No, not _every night. _And, you know, it's not like I didn't try, Rach! But things got in the way, ya know? Like Italian guys, or ex-fiances! Or . . .or, or, Italian guys!", he counted off on his fingers.

"Hey, there was only _one_ Italian guy, okay! And do you have a point?"

"My point is, I . . .I don't need this right now, okay? It, it's too late." Her angry face fell back into hurt as he continued. "I'm with somebody else, I'm _happy_. This ship has sailed!"

She was running out of arguments. "Yeah, what are you saying, you just sort of 'put away' feelings or whatever the hell it was you had for me?"

He stopped, and replied, dead-serious, "Hey, I've been doing it since the ninth grade, I've gotten pretty damn good at it."

"Alright, fine, you go right ahead and you do that, alright Ross?", she replied in a disbelieving tone.

"Fine."

"Cause I don't need your stupid ship!"

"Good."

"Good!"

Ross stormed out of the shop, Rachel hot on his heels. When the door slammed in her face, she opened it right back up.

"And ya know what? NOW I've got closure!" she shouted after him. She slammed the door, and locked all the locks on the inside. Her breathing was heavy from the fight as she walked to sit on the orange couch, shaking all the way. She buried her face in her hands, the tears finally finding a way out of her reluctant eyes.

He came back. With the look of utmost regret and apology on his face, he stared at her through the locked window. _He'd_ inflicted this hurt on her. The more he thought each second, the more he knew she was right; if it weren't for him hiding his feelings in the first place, they wouldn't be in this situation now.

It took a minute before Rachel could stop the tears, wiping her face as she recollected herself. She stood up, smoothing out her apron, before turning to finish cleaning. However, a pair of big puppy eyes staring from the door caught her attention.

She inhaled deeply- this was it.

Silently, her eyes locked on his the entire time, she returned to the door. It seemed to take years to get every lock undone, especially when she wasn't watching what she was doing. Her breathing was becoming more and more erratic by the second. When she finally thought she was done, she pulled on the handle, but the door didn't budge. She pulled it with a confused look on her face.

"Try the bottom one," Ross said softly.

She looked into his eyes again, surprised that he broke the deafening silence, before reaching down and pulling the bottom lock undone. She slowly opened the door, waiting. Time seemed to stop moving.

Before anything could register, Ross rushed into the shop, taking her waist in his hands, almost lifting her off the ground. She lifted her hands to his face, meeting in a kiss full of so much longing and passion that they could barely take it. What was going on?

Doubts couldn't even begin to creep into either's mind. Rachel slid her hands down to his neck, opening her mouth and allowing the kiss to intensify quickly. She shivered as she felt his hands slid up her back, over her shoulders, rubbing her neck, before . . .oh God, they were in her hair. She pulled her arms tighter around his neck, pulling him so close that they could just melt into each other . . .if they didn't fall down first.

Realizing support was needed, Ross backed Rachel towards the wall, neither pulling apart from the embrace.

She trailed her hands down his back. He rested his hands on her neck, keeping his thumbs on her cheeks as they both just sunk into the kiss. Nothing mattered anymore- this was just the two of them, caught in a moment. A wonderful moment.

Ok, an incredibly wonderful, amazingly passionate, I'm-going-to-tell-this-to-my-grandkids-one-day moment.

It seemed a good five minutes until they finally broke apart. Neither moved an inch, keeping their hands in place as if they were glued to each other. Almost as if they really _had_ melted.

"Wow," Rachel breathed, her voice barely above a whisper. Both were breathing heavily, their hearts beating wild with fire and need. They stared deep into each other's eyes, not entirely sure how- or even if - this would change anything. But a line had been crossed, and there was no longer any turning back. Something like this couldn't be shrugged off and forgotten.

"Should we?", he asked shyly, questioning whether it should continue.

"It's up to you," she answered, her voice quiet and gentle.

He thought a moment, but he wasn't sure why. Julie was about five thousand miles into the vastness of his mind right now. "What the hell," he stated, pulling Rachel into the embrace again.

This kiss was slower, more tender, more gentle than the first. Not so much need, but emotion. There was so much emotion behind it- they _needed_ the first one, but they _wanted_ the second. They felt how much they wanted it, not even able to surpress small moans in this kiss.

It was at least another ten minutes before either thought to pull away. Rachel's arms had moved under his, hugging him around the middle as he continued to massage her neck and face in time to the kiss. But eventually, they realized that they couldn't stay here all night.

Or could they?

Ross's mind finally cleared, and he pulled away, moving his hands to the sides of her arms. He became a bit tense, knowing that they shouldn't have done that. She looked back at him, her deep blue eyes large and wet, absorbing every second of the moment. He softened, knowing that one lingering gaze into those eyes would keep him from hurting her again.

"Rach, I'm . . .I'm sorry. So sorry."

She nodded. "I know."

To ensure her that he wasn't deciding anything now, he bent down for one last kiss, softly brushing her lips with his. He brought a face to her cheek again, rubbing it affectionatly.

She nodded again, ensuring him that it was okay to leave if he wanted to. He lowered his arms to take her hands in his, squeezing them tightly before slowly leaving the shop.

She watched him go, her chest filling up with a strange feeling. Light, airy, yet at the same time, heavy and thick. Whatever it was, it felt amazing. She smiled to herself, knowing that she'd just had the best kiss of her life. She didn't care if this changed anything- it was all so ground-breaking that all she could think about was getting home to sleep, to fill her dreams with thoughts of the kiss continuing . . .

But what did Ross think?

Oh well, she'd see him tomorrow. Maybe they could talk about it. Maybe they could do this again . . . She shivered with delight and anticipation at the thought. She left the towel on the counter, not even thinking to finish what she's started what seemed like ages ago. She hurried to frantically grab her purse and coat, getting the key to lock the door behind her, before bounding to get up to her apartment.

She just _had_ to tell Monica and Phoebe about this.

Man, they were in for the best girl talk they'd had in a long time.

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Reviews make me oh-so-happy, hehehe 


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